Pound-For-Pound

THE CRUELEST SPORT POUND-FOR-POUND LIST

(Updated February 23, 2010)

Numero Uno, baby!

#1 Holly Holm

In addition to being the number one ranked female boxer in the world on Boxrec.com (whose idiotic computer system fails to rank Henry Armstrong on its pound-for-pound list) and knocking out a woman picked out of the audience at her last fight,  Holm is probably the hottest boxer on earth.  Only Natascha Ragosina and Ana Julaton are better-looking.  Holm always comes to rumble, is in better shape than Chris Arreola, fights harder than Kevin Johnson, draws bigger crowds than Chad Dawson, and is more exciting than Floyd Mayweather Jr.

#2 Edwin Valero

Twenty-seven fights and twenty-seven knockouts.  One of the greatest punchers of all time!  Not even Sugar Ray Robinson had a 100% KO record.  Valero is on the fast-track to the Hall of Fame.

#3 Michael Katsidis

One of the most accomplished fighters in boxing today is lightweight Michael Katsidis. He has won eight championships so far in his career.  In fact, 14 of his 28 professional bouts have been for titles, including his pro debut.  At 29, Katsidis will probably win more titles than anyone in boxing history by the time he retires.  Also, he wears a funky Greek warrior helmet into the ring.

#4 Beibut Shumenov

Shumenov is right behind Katsidis in collecting titles and he is on the Nova Express to greatness.  Shumenov may look crude, slow, unimaginative, and ungainly in the ring, but in just his tenth pro bout, he captured the WBA LIGHT HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP OF THE WORLD by handily beating Gabriel Campillo in Las Vegas.  In his 10 professional bouts thus far, Shumenov has had 14 titles on the line.  In 2009, for example, Shumenov faced former super middleweight champion Byron Mitchell in a bout where four titles were at stake simultaneously, including three for “Asian” championships.  Shumenov is a threat to every titleholder in boxing!

#5 Kassim Ouma

Not only did Ouma resurrect, rejuvenate, and redeem his career by losing to Vanes Martirosyan last month, but he also entered the ring to the roaring sounds of Judas Priest, a fresh change of pace from all the rap and mariachi music boxing is drowning in.  If Ouma enters the ring to Motorhead next time—“Killed By Death” or “Iron Fist” would be good choices—look for him to move up on the P-4-P ratings.   Naturally, if Ouma ever wins another fight, he will move up as well.

#6 Guillermo Rigondeaux

The Cuban amateur standout has knocked out three of his last four opponents with body shots.  That proves his dominance! Besides, Joe Tessitore already called him one of the greatest fighters in the world.  The rumormill (not boxingscene.com on this occasion) reported that Tessitore howled so loud the last time he was at ringside for a Rigondeaux bout, that he lost control of his bowels.   That should be enough to put Rigondeaux on any P-4-P list.

#7 Jose Benavidez

Even before the bell sounded for his professional debut, the 17-year old Benavidez was called a future champ.  After blowing out Steve Cox in one round, ringside announcer Barry Tompkins had this to say: “Jose Benavidez Junior—looking like a champion after one fight!”  The usual internet suspects chimed in along similar lines within minutes.  The Cruelest Sport never likes to differ with the experts, so Benavidez is #7.

#8 Marian Banciu

Although he has yet to win a single fight (his record is 0-32-2, 27 knockouts) Banciu is one of the top fighters in Romania and those two draws prove that one day he will have a chance at redemption and possibly wind up the subject of a cliche-ridden article by Lyle Fitzsimmons.

#9 Hyacinthus Turnipseed

Like Valero, Turnipseed also has a 100% KO ratio, having lost all of his bouts by stoppage.  But the real reason he is on the inaugural TCS P-4-P list is his name. Hyacinthus Turnipseed has a name that might be better suited for a character out of Faulkner or Thomas Pynchon.   It would really be something if Turnipseed scored a knockout on Showtime, where Gus Johnson would lose all of his marbles simultaneously.  “Oh! Oh!  Lightning in a bottle!  Hyacinthus TURNIP-seed!!!  He stretched him!  Oh my!  Hyacinthus TURNIP-seed!!!”

#10 Jesus Ruiz

The rugged Mexican has lost all thirteen of his fights by knockout, which means he never allows crooked, narcoleptic, or incompetent judges to turn in bizarre scorecards that might add up to robberies.   Boxing needs more of his kind, especially since any fight that is not a blowout these days immediately becomes “controversial.”

#10 (INTERIM) Jorge Linares

Because Oscar De La Hoya says so.